waking up from a depressed state...

For the past few years in my life I’ve constantly pondered on what would make me truly happy. This very question has lead me to the depths of depression. At one point, it occurred to me that I was indeed unhappy with how things are turning out in my life. I’ve certainly hoped for more… dreamed of a prominent place in the grand scheme of things. It seems I have fallen way short of my own expectations. I felt stuck, trapped, imprisoned in a hopeless state of existence. It was such a frustrating reality not being able live up to my dreams, not being able to get an inch closer to those aspirations. Then again, it got me thinking, what did I want for myself? Somehow the question left me dumbfounded; realizing that I was completely clueless… I actually didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. How was I supposed to live a dream that I haven’t even figured out yet?

li'l things that made my day

• i turned down a new post being offered after careful deliberation
• my leave was approved
• i finally booked my ticket for a 1 week holiday in cdo & manila, yipeee!!!
• a dragging departmental meeting mainly in Mandarin; heck, it sure brought out my artistic skills and i suddenly remembered the sign language for the alphabet
• MOS Burger dinner with friends; endless teasing and laughing
• chismis-filled lunch date with mimi and natalie
• it's Friday the 13th
• serious tit-a-tat with mimi over heart matters
• realizing i'm becoming old for clubbing and drinking; but still can la
• catching up with rina; she's made it to singapore
• chat with old & new friends online
• repeatedly played 'kon mun rak' on cd; must be more than 10 times
• trivial conversations with housemates
• favourite past time: friendstering with fellow bordie claire
• discovering that, yeah, my blog account is still alive.. hoho
• uber excited friends over something they're desperately waiting for

oh well, i'm just thankful for everything that happened today. tomorrow's another day to look forward to! ces't la vie!